


10 Years

by UisceOneLove



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But I promise there is plenty of talking between Finn and Poe, Dog BB-8, Finn and Rey are adoptive siblings, Finn has scars, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, High School Reunion, Kylo getting some redemption, Love Confessions, Love that was definitely there but was seen as unrequited, M/M, Multi, Mutual Pining, Panic Attacks, Poe singing for Finn, Referenced Bullying, Referenced Drug Abuse, Rose and Rey being tired of Finn's obliviousness, based on a movie, finn being oblivious, loosely, minor hurt and comfort, poe singing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:09:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23302924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UisceOneLove/pseuds/UisceOneLove
Summary: Finn returning for his high school reunion was not at all his idea. It was Rey's. The traitor.But seeing Poe might not make it such a bad thing.10 Years AU.
Relationships: Leia Organa/Han Solo, Poe Dameron & Finn, Poe Dameron & Rey, Poe Dameron/Finn, Rose Tico & Finn, Rose Tico & Rey, insinuated Jessica Pava/Rey
Comments: 14
Kudos: 78





	10 Years

**Author's Note:**

> I had an idea for this years ago but didn't touch it. Now I have. I couldn't help it after thinking of Poe writing a song for Finn that confesses his feelings and then Finn has no idea until it's finally sung in person to him. 
> 
> So I recommend at the very least watching the video of Oscar Isaac singing "Best I Never Had" so you can have your body melt from his voice and feels burst out of your chest.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy!

“Why did I let you talk me into this?” Finn asked, staring up forlornly at the building in front of them.

His closest and dearest friend, who he also currently hated, hooked her arm through his with a smile.

“Because,” Rey responded, “we deserve this chance to rub it in Kylo’s and Hux’s faces that we’ve surpassed them.”

Finn scoffed. “I’m okay with not having to do that at all.”

Rey rolled her eyes.

“Then because we both miss Principal Organa and want to tell her in person how sorry we are about Han.”

He wavered. It was true; Han Solo was one of those teachers that the whole school loved despite whether they had him for auto shop or not. The gruff teacher who secretly (but not really secretly) gave a kriff. Mr. Solo was who helped Finn through some dark times.

“Fine,” Finn gave in.

Rey was only kind enough to not look _too_ smug as she pulled him into the double door of Jakku High School.

“It won’t be so bad,” Rey insisted.

Finn took one look at the rich red lockers and tanned linoleum floors and instantly felt like he was waiting to be body-checked into the wall.

“Sure,” he muttered, “why wouldn’t it be a traumatic experience to come back? You know, to the place that thrived on a student body content to mentally destroy you?”

Rey squeezed his arm. “I’ll kick their asses again at first sight.”

“Just leave me with my pride, Rey.”

“We’ll be an hour tops. We’ll see Principal Organa, do a round for old time’s sake, enjoy the free bar and food, and then we can go back to the hotel for the splurging of room service while we marathon _American Pickers_.”

“I’m going to hold you to that.”

It was easy enough to follow the increasing volume of nostalgia-driven music to the gym. A banner hung from above the doors that boldly stated “Welcome Back, Class of ’10!” while balloons littered the nearby floor. Other guests – former classmates – were stopping at a table by the doors before going inside.

“Guess there’s officially no turning now,” Finn sighed, still reluctant to do this but Rey could easily tackle him if he runs so this was it.

“None at all,” Rey confirmed. She pulled him along some more to the table and joined in the line.

“Names?” they were asked when it was their turn.

“Rey and Finn Palpatine.” Finn had to hold back his wince; it’s been years since he’s gone by that last name. Since either of them have.

The woman looked up from the list with wide eyes. “Rey? Finn?” Now that he could see her face, she looked very familiar.

“Rose?” Finn’s face split into a grin. “Look at you! You look great!”

Rose shot up from her chair and almost threw herself over the table just so she could pull them into a hug.

“Oh my God!” Rose exclaimed.

“It’s good to see you, too,” Rey laughed as she Finn an amused look behind Rose’s back.

“Oh my God!” Their friend repeated.

Finn fought back his own look. “I think we broke her?”

Rose let them go but couldn’t stop smiling. “I can’t believe that you guys are here!”

Okay, so maybe there were a couple of good things to come from being back here. “Why would we miss the chance to see you?” he asked.

“We’ve got a lot to catch up on,” Rey agreed. “Are you going to be joining everyone inside?”

“Oh, once everyone’s checked in. I’ve been assisting Cecil with the whole event.”

Rey and Finn shared a confused look. “Cecil?” they asked.

Rose held out their name tags. Oh, look, the senior photo that made him look like he was drenched in a bucket of sweat. “Yeah, sorry. C3PO?”

“ _That’s_ his name?” If he were Cecil, the nickname would have been a better choice to him, too.

“No wonder he acted like some anal-attentive droid,” Rey added under her breath. Finn had to fight a snort.

Rose bit back her own smile but only halfway succeeded.

“We’ll see you in there, then,” Finn told her. “We’ll save you a drink.”

“Sure thing!”

Finn stepped away from the table to let the next selection of former students fill in. He was fairly certain one of them had been in his freshman Algebra class.

“Oh!” Rey stopped suddenly to look back over at Rose. “Has Principal Organa gotten here yet? Is she coming?”

“Yeah, she’s around here,” Rose confirmed distractedly, “I think she went to her office. But she’ll be inside later for a speech.”

“I guess I’ll wait to see her if she’s trying to get some privacy.”

Stepping through the doors and into the gym was the biggest hit of high school flashbacks since Finn’s old nightmares. Despite the balloons and streamers, despite the tables around the room or the little drink station, it was still the place of terror that he dreaded. It was like being seventeen all over again.

How were these things _not_ expected to feel awkward?

There were plenty of people that he could still pinpoint from the past. Three-fourths of them were people he never wanted to deal with again. But a few he could also remember with good feelings like with Rose.

It was seriously only a few.

“Get us one of these tables?” Rey suggested. “I’ll grab us drinks.”

“An hour, Rey,” Finn reminded her.

Rey waved him off with a roll of his eyes. “I know.”

Left with the feelings of abandonment, Finn steeled himself before he entered the battlefield.

He could see an empty table set up to the side of the stage that was being used currently for the music. Finn looked around at scattered groups of former classmates, waiting until he was sure no one was paying any attention to him, and then he went for it.

The table was close. He could taste the freedom. Everyone was too busy to pay any notice. They didn’t look at him back then anyway unless Ms. Phasma or one of the First Order assholes were making an example of him.

“Two-One-Eight-Seven.”

Finn froze.

Shit. He should have known it was too good to be true.

“Even in the surprisingly stylish Tom Ford, I knew it was you.”

Never take your eyes off a predator. That’s how the lions and wolves got you. It’s the only reason Finn made himself turn around.

Armitage Huxley looked like the same red-haired weasel that he was in school. His hair was still slicked back in an all-too greasy Crispin Glover way. His clothes were still all back as if he was attending daily funerals. And that infuriating sneer that made Finn feel like nothing but garbage every time it was worn for him.

“You don’t look to have changed, Hux,” Finn said, stiffening his upper lip. Might as well get it over with.

“Yes, well,” Hux replied with narrow eyes,” it seems the same cannot be said for you. Moved up in the world finally?”

“Not everyone chooses to have access to a trust fund. Or want to work for their daddy dearest for the rest of their lives.”

The glint of Huxley’s teeth hit Finn’s stomach with a reflexive feeling of fear. “It was very…ambitious of you when you didn’t. Is Rey here, by chance?”

“So that she can kick your ass again?” Finn asked. There was still some embarrassment at being looked out for by his sister but the pride exceeded it far more.

Like now, when Hux’s sneer became more of a scowl and that holier-than-thou posture got some holes in it.

“I can call her over if you’re feeling like retelling the story of when Rey destroyed your battleship model after that name you spread got around.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Hux spat out, turning on his heels and walking away.

_How was I afraid of that guy?_ Finn asked himself.

He was still able to grab the table after that unfortunate encounter. From his spot, he could see Rey chatting up Mr. Chewy at the bar as well as some girl. He couldn’t tell who it was since her back was to him but the three of them looked to be having a good time.

Finn took notice of the stage and the screen that was hooked up to someone’s laptop. On the screen played a photo slideshow from their class. Dances, lunches, social events.

Why couldn’t he have gotten some kind of flu or case that would have gotten him out of this?

“Finn!” Rey hurried up to the table and slid a drink in front of him. He couldn’t decide how alarmed he should be at how bright the blue and green of the alcohol was.

“What are these?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Rey responded excitedly. “Guess who’s—”

“I mean, it kind of _does_ matter what I’m about to—”

“Just listen to—”

“—I would like to not—”

“ _Finn!_ ”

He sheepishly stopped and took a sip of his drink. Oh. That tasted pretty nice, actually. “Sorry.”

Exasperated, Rey let out a huff before she let the excitement show up again.

“Jessica Pava is here.”

“Is that who you were talking to?” Rey nodded. “Wasn’t she a senior? You worked with her and her group on Mr. Solo’s old race car.”

“The Millennium Falcon was more than just some race car,” Rey responded indignantly. “And that group was The Resistance, thank you.”

Right. Of course, Finn knew that. The Resistance were the lower-income kids in the school who didn’t stand back while the First Order kids laid out their reign. It was well agreed that the groups despised each other.

Wealth and egos were pretty big factors.

“I still can’t believe they accepted you.”

“When you’re a good person, Finn, it doesn’t matter how much money your family has,” Rey stated with a swig of her drink. “They were people who knew that.”

Finn hummed. That was fair. “Also helped that you had teacher backing.”

“That helped, yes,” she agreed.

Principal Organa, Mr. Solo, Mr. Chewy. They all loved Rey. She was pretty well-loved all around despite who their grandfather was.

“So why’s Jess Pava here?” he asked.

“She’s here for Mr. Solo’s funeral. I guess Principal Organa invited her to come tonight.”

They both took a long drink. Finn eyed his glass again. “Okay, seriously, what is this called?”

“Jess said they’re Lightsabers.”

“Lightsabers? What the frak is a lightsaber?”

Rey shrugged. “Didn’t ask what’s in it.”

“Then how are we going to make these for ourselves?”

Rey grinned and shrugged again. “We could always invite the guy who made them.”

Now Finn was starting to get suspicious.

“You mean Jess?” he asked slowly.

“We can invite her, too.”

Yeah. He’s a lot suspicious.

“Who made the drinks, Rey?”

“That’s the exciting part, Finn.”

“I’m waiting for you to get to why.”

Rey shifted closer to him and pointed towards the bar. “Look who’s with Pava.”

This was a bunch of beating around the bush when they both hated that kind of thing. He was ready to tell her off for it, too. Finn looked Jess’s way like Rey was so keen for him to do, preparing for his verbal onslaught, so ready to—

“Rey.”

“Yes, Finn?”

“Is that Poe Dameron?”

“Yes, it is.”

Finn nodded. Okay. Then he turned around to finish _both_ of their lightsabers. “That’s our cue to go.”

“What?” Rey frowned. “No, it’s your cue to go and talk to him.”

“The last thing a guy like that needs is for some loser like me to regale him with stupid high school conversations we briefly shared.”

Rey punched his arm.

“Ow!” he yelped, rubbing at the spot in hopes of soothing the pain away.

“I don’t care what Kyloe or Hux or our grandfather have said. You’ve never been a loser, Finn.”

He smiled wanly. “Not all of us were supposed to be the prodigal grandchild. It’s fine.”

He was the one who was disowned and labeled a traitor when he refused to fall in line in high school. Finn had hated the way the First Order kids treated everyone else. So he’d said no to following their commands on that. He took the blame for Rey joining him on the other side and the fact that she chose to be a car driver-slash-mechanic instead of taking a position at grandfather’s company. Finn was used to it. Really.

“Ow!” he complained again after Rey’s second hit.

“You’re amazing,” Rey insisted. “So stop thinking that stuff. Poe thought you were great. Everyone in The Resistance did. You were too much of an idiot to pay attention, that’s all.”

“So am I amazing or an idiot?” Finn challenged. “I can’t be both.”

“Oh, you can be. It’s your talent, Finn.”

Finn can be what?” Rose asked as she approached. She carefully set three new glasses of Lightsabers down on the table.

“An amazing and smart guy who is also completely stupid when it comes to the people who want to date him.”

“Oh,” Rose nodded, “Poe?”

Finn looked between them, appalled.

“I’m feeling very attacked right now,” he grumbled.

“We mean it in the best way,” Rose replied soothingly.

“How is that supposed to be helpful or best?”

Rey and Rose shared a look. That’s supposed to be _his_ thing with Rey.

“Poe touched you,” Rose said. “A lot.”

“To make sure I was okay,” he said defensively.

“He always called you ‘buddy’,” Rey added.

“To be _nice_ ,” Finn returned.

The girls shared yet another look. This was getting ridiculous!

“Finn,” Rose started, “he gave you his jacket.”

“And he didn’t even care when it got torn during that fight with Kylo,” Rey pointed out. “Poe only wanted to make sure _you_ were the one who was okay and recovering.”

He knew the jacket, okay? It was brown and buttery soft leather that made Finn feel like he was wearing a cloud. A warm cloud that smelled like the ocean or a forest the way Poe’s cologne did.

Finn spent a lot of time in that jacket. So he wasn’t going to forget about it any time soon.

He also wasn’t going to forget that fight. His nightmares made sure of it.

“Because he’s a _nice guy_ ,” Finn stressed to them.

“He never asked for it back,” Rose added lastly, and significantly.

“Poe said it looked good on me so I should keep it! Why are you two trying so hard to make it into a thing?”

Rose shook her head sadly. “Even out of school you’re as oblivious and as in denial as ever.”

“He’s hopeless,” Rey groaned.

“Or you both are imagining things,” Finn countered weakly.

“Hopeless,” the girls agreed.

“Well what about you, Rey?” he shot back. “You were all into Pava. Are you planning on making a move?”

Rey gave him a sharp smile. “I already did.”

“You did?” Rose smiled and nudged at his sister’s side. “Nice.”

“Is that why we have Lightsabers?” Finn asked, defeated.

“Part of it.” Rey took his hand in hers. “We’re not in high school anymore. You’ve proven how much better you are than most of the First Order dicks and grandfather. And Poe Dameron, by some kind of force, is here at our reunion. This is your chance, Finn. Just tell him how you’ve felt.”

Finn deflated against the table. “I can’t.” He shook his head and gave the girls a sad smile. “It was a school crush. After ten years it’s kind of one of those things I’ve got to leave in the past.”

Rey sighed but squeezed his hand. Rose put hers over his arm to do the same.

“It’s okay, Finn.”

Sure it was. That’s why they were looking at him as if he was some orphaned baby animal that was left in the pouring rain.

That was, until everyone’s ears were assaulted by the loud squeal of a microphone.

C3PO – Cecil, _wow_ – tapped on the mic, causing another scream of feedback.

“Hello, my former students. I’d graciously like to welcome you to the Jakku High School Class of 2010 Reunion!”

There was way too much enthusiasm in the cheers and applause around them. How was it that they all didn’t dread this day like he did?

“Yes, I’m excited to see all you familiar faces after so many years,” the man went on. “We have a slideshow ready to go for you to look back on as well as a Prom Court revival.”

“How are they going to do that when Kylo isn’t here?” Rose frowned.

“I’d be shocked if he showed his face tonight,” Rey responded darkly.

Finn took his turn at comforting her switching the position of their hands. She didn’t respond except to hold him tighter.

“But before we get into that, there is someone else who would like to take a moment of your time.” Cecil held his hand out toward the gym’s entrance. “Please give a warm greeting to Principal Organa.”

Everyone whipped their heads to the view as applause became a roar. Principal Organa was still a beacon of strength and grace as she came in. It was impossible to think of anyone who didn’t hold respect for her. She was a woman who knew how to be just while compassionate. Finn and Rey both built a strong relationship with her thanks to the guidance she sought to personally shove with them.

And now, despite the charcoal grey suit she was wearing along with a shift in the space around her that could only be a connection to grief, Finn was still only deep in awe of her.

Finn didn’t think he’d be as brave and successful as he was without her involvement in his life.

Rey’s next words ripped his eyes away from their former principal and to the person escorting her.

“Bullocks. Is that Kylo?”

“I can’t believe he showed up,” Rose agreed.

By the angry and shocked looks around them, Finn would say the thought was vastly mutual amongst their old classmates.

He’d agree, too, but he was stuck. Kylo made it impossible to move or speak, or do anything, besides watch. What made it worse was that there was something unsettlingly different about Kylo.

As if he _knew_ what Finn was struggling with, his once tormentor looked his way.

Finn stiffened as he watched… _something_ flicker on the man’s face, but before anything else could be done, hands were turning him away.

“He can’t do anything now,” Rey promised in his ear.

“Finn?” Rose said worriedly.

_The searing pain. Like a blowtorch setting his back on fire._

“Finn. Can you hear me?”

_He could taste the smoke on his tongue._

“Wait—”

_The smell would have made him throw up if he hadn’t been busy passing out._

“Whoa, buddy, are you okay?”

Finn didn’t pay anyone any mind. He rushed out of the gym, his feet taking him mindlessly through the halls until he was shoving open a bathroom door and hurling himself against the cold tiled wall. It did little to center him initially. He slid down the wall while he panted, a phantom pain shooting along his spine.

_Traitor_ , a ghostly voice hissed through his mind.

Finn didn’t regret what he did back then. He just wished he wasn’t a physical reminder of the consequence. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been curled up in the corner working on his breathing. Rey and Rose were probably worried out of their minds.

Nearing his thirties and he was still good at humiliating himself in front of a giant group of people.

A click of the door handle warned him someone was coming. Of course he wasn’t going to get a chance to straighten himself out first.

“Finn? You okay buddy?”

Nothing could have prepared Finn in that moment to get a look at Poe Dameron.

It was like time had decided Poe was too perfect to touch.

Tanned face that was wrinkle-free, hair that was still all bouncy dark curls. Eyes so expressive and open that Finn felt that old temptation to dive inside them.

He will not allow himself to start mentally waxing poetic about Poe’s hands.

None of this was giving a verbal answer either. He should probably do that before his high school crush thinks he’s having a mental breakdown.

Which. He kind of is.

But it’s the principle of the thing. You know?

“Finn?” Poe tried again. “Should I go get Rey for you?”

“No!” There. That was something. A thing that really brought him back to high school. How pathetic was he?

“Okay. No Rey.” Understanding filled the man’s expression as he nodded. “It was Kylo, right?”

“Guess I’m still stuck in this place,” Finn replied with a bitter smile.

Poe lowered himself to the floor (they both shouldn’t be ruining such nice suits with the linoleum) and slid next to Finn. “I mean, it wasn’t just name-calling that he did,” he pointed out, “so I wouldn’t expect it to be easy to move on.”

Rey’s said that, too.

“But you were never this stylish in school so I don’t know how you expect to still go here,” Poe added.

Finn choked on a laugh. That was terrible. Seeing the all too pleased look from the other man told him that was what he’d been after either way.

“Rey’s been dressing me since the end of university,” Finn responded.

“She’s always secretly had good taste.” Poe started to reach out, as if to feel along the suit’s arm, but quickly dropped his hand. “Is that blue velvet?”

Finn nodded. “I think that makes it a lot fancier than my other suits.”

“More than one suit?” Poe hummed. “Sounds like you’ve got a pretty big job.”

“I guess I do.”

“So what did Finn Palpatine become that keeps him in the Best Dressed category?”

“A lawyer, actually.”

Poe broke out in delighted laughter.

“What?” Finn asked, not sure it was actually a good kind of delighted.

“Nothing,” Poe shook his head with a grin, “What section of law?”

“Public defender. A lot of assaults come my way. Or money. But I also like to do pro bono since so many people can’t afford representation.”

It was everything his grandfather wasn’t. So he was proud of that.

“ _You_ threw us all through a loop, though,” Finn continued.

Poe groaned half-heartedly. “It was the last thing I expected either.”

“I mean, being a pilot fit. I always thought you’d be one.”

“Yeah?” Poe raised a brow, amused. “What told you that?”

Finn shrunk a bit. “You were always mentioning how your parents had been in the Air Force. And Rey had told me about a couple of times where you, Jess, and Snap would make plans during auto shop over what you’d call your own planes.”

“You remember all of that?” he asked, surprised.

“It was important to you. Of course I remember.”

Poe looked as if Finn just gave him a Christmas present. Close to glowing, even.

Finn’s the one who made it happen.

He just didn’t quite get how.

“So you cared about the thing I’d tell you Finn?”

It wasn’t fair how Poe could make his stomach still explode with butterflies. “After the way you looked out for me? Yeah. You helped me out way more than you should have.”

“Hey,” Poe frowned, “none of what they were doing to you was deserved. Helping you was the right thing to do. I wanted to help you. Every time.”

Movies have taught Finn that this would be the part where he and Poe feel some powerful magnetizing attraction that leads them to kiss for the first time. In high school, those fantasies had flooded his dreams night after night.

Things weren’t the same now. He didn’t live in a bubble of fantasies anymore.

“I’m sorry I’ve kept you on the bathroom floor,” Finn told him with a grimace. He really hoped they were still cleaned thoroughly. “We should get back to the gym before Rey sends out a search party.”

Poe’s glow dimmed. “It’s no problem, Finn,” he said with a disappointed smile.

Did Finn just make some kind of mistake without knowing it? Or did Poe actually like his company?

Poe helped him up before Finn started to wipe at the velvet to make sure no tissue paper or anything else was stuck to it. When he looked to the other man, he took in the fidgeting with furrowed brows.

“Are you okay, Poe?”

Poe laughed. The sound wasn’t light like his usual laugh. The one Finn would hear when they’d happen to pass each other in the halls and Jess or Snap had said something funny. “Oh yeah, I’m fine, Finn.”

“That doesn’t sound like you’re fine,” he protested.

“I guess, maybe, I was avoiding the people out there, too.”

“You?” Finn stared, incredulous. “You used to be surrounded by people. Everyone loved you.”

“It was like that,” Poe nodded, chagrined, “but now it’s crazy. Befoe, I could get in Black One and fly and only deal with my co-pilots surrounding me for drinks.”

So Poe _did_ name it that. Finn was glad.

“Right,” Finn replied, “the singing.”

The brunet sighed. “Yeah.”

“Afraid your fans will shower you with too much adoration?”

“There’s only one person I’ve ever wanted the adoration from.”

That intense look was back. It sent heat rising up the back of Finn’s neck and a coil of it in his belly. Finn had to look away. But when the door was being opened to the bathroom all he saw looking back was Poe holding it, smirking.

“Doesn’t hurt to get it from my dog either."

“You got a dog?” Finn stepped out into the hallway. It looked safely empty at least.

Poe’s face brightened up again as they walked. Finn let him be the one to lead. Habit again. “BB. He’s a corgi that Snap convinced me to adopt last year.”

Finn snorted.

“What?” Poe asked, with that smile again energizing his beautiful face.

“I don’t believe that he had to do much convincing in order for you to adopt an animal.”

“Oh? Why not?”

“The litter of dumpster kittens at Homecoming? The three-legged dog on MILK Day? Or the bunny-fox pair from your graduation?”

“How did you know about graduation?”

Finn saw every photo that they and others posed on Facebook. None of that was going to be told to Poe, however. It sounded stalkerish to Finn’s ears so it would definitely sound that way to anyone else who knew.

“I heard things,” he said with a shrug.

“Fine, the point is taken. But BB is the best dog.”

“No bias there?”

Poe widened his eyes. “Me? Buddy. Finn. Would I ever play favorites?”

Finn didn’t need to think about that. “Yes.”

The older man sniffed and stuck his nose up. It didn’t last long before a smile broke back out. “Okay, don’t take it from me then. Ask Jess and Snap. Or Leia.”

“Who’s Leia?” Finn started to feel a dark, heavy pit form in his stomach. Why wouldn’t Poe have someone by now? He’s an incredible catch.

“Oh, right,” Poe shook his head. “Principal Organa.”

That was her first name? Did Rey know?

“We’ve stayed in touch since graduation. That’s why I’m here, really.”

“Jess mentioned that to Rey,” Finn said softly. “I’m sorry, by the way. I know all of you were the closest students to Mr. Solo.”

Poe blinked in surprise. A tinier version of his smile came around. “Mr. Solo was a great teacher. But I think we’re all going to power through. Leia is still as tough as ever. She’ll make it.”

He and Rey thought so too.

It was still bittersweet to him when they arrived at the gym. Getting to have Por to himself for this short time after ten years was as close to dreams coming true as he’d be able to ever get. But Finn was okay with that.

From the entrance, they could see Principal Organa still on the stage. He felt a little guilty for missing out on her speech, but what he was hearing now was still good.

“Finn.”

Finn could look at Poe all day if it was possible. “Yeah, Poe?”

Poe shifted, leaning in closer. The proximity was making his heart rate pick up all over again. “My music. Have you listened to it?”

Finn winced and scratched at the back of his neck, feeling guilty for a new reason. “I haven’t really, no,” he answered. “I kept meaning to, but I’ve been caught up with work this year. Rey had to pull me away just to make me show up to this.”

There was also the belayed feeling of utterly soul-crushing moroseness if he had to hear Poe sing about being in love with someone.

He didn’t expect to see Poe look so resigned, no, disappointed. That’s what it was earlier, too. Did it really matter that much to Poe if Finn hasn’t heard any of his music?

“I’m sorry,” Finn started to say, and then was promptly cut off when he heard Principal Organa.

“While the support of my students is held dearly in this old ticker of mine, it’s time to get back to the more joyous festivities.” The applause was as loud and vast, as expected when she was up front. “We felt the way to welcome you back to base was a little slideshow of memories past. We also thought it would be a nice treat to have it accompanied by a song or two from an upperclassman you all know very well.”

Finn stared at Poe. So that was what Poe had been talking about earlier when he said he was also hiding.

The man shrugged it off as a new look formed on Poe’s face that Finn didn’t have time to figure out because everyone else was busy acting like Paul McCartney or Adele was in the room.

“We’ll talk later,” Poe told him, and then Finn was left to watch the guy walk away.

It wasn’t a bad view, either, but Finn wasn’t able to really appreciate it this time around. So instead of pathetically standing there for the rest of the event, he got the bright idea to shuffle his feet until he was back at the table where Rey and Rose were waiting for him.

“How’d that go?” Rey asked excitedly.

“I’m doing better, thanks,” Finn responded flatly.

“As soon as we saw Poe take off after you, we knew you’d be in good hands,” she dismissed, “so did you talk?”

“Sure. We talked.”

“And?” Rose prompted, bouncing on her toes.

Finn threw up his hands. “And what? He said some things to make me feel better, I said things that made me sound like an idiot a couple of times, we are now updated on where life took us.”

Rey stared him down unimpressed. “You had him to yourself and talking for at least ten minutes, and you didn’t get the balls to come out about your undying and eternal love for him?”

“Why can’t you leave it alone? I thought we went through this already?”

“That was before!”

“Before _what_?”

The plucked strings of an acoustic guitar picked up in the microphone and thankfully silenced this conversation.

Poe looked strangely comfortable on the stage. He sat in the center of the stage on a stool with the aforementioned instrument cradled against his chest. It was a fun melody that went with the jovial tone in Poe’s voice. Finn needed to be less of a selfish coward when this was what he’d been missing out on.

Behind Poe, the projector screen changed from some gaudy Class of ’10 title card to the first round of pictures. There wasn’t a lot of reason for him to care about most of the pictures in the slides. They were the generic shots of school teams and cliques. A few did make him smile, like when he saw Rose or Rey. There were some photos of Rey with Mr. Solo and The Resistance, and Rose leading the debate and track teams to victory. Prom and Homecoming photos of the courts, Dress Like a Sci-Fi Character Day photos where Rey had been some mystical scavenger-fighter and had convinced Finn to put on a bulky white suit of armor that he’d been sweating through by second period. These memories were nice. They were ones Finn didn’t mind going back to.

There was even a picture of them from when they graduated; caps high in the sky while they were grinning ear-to-ear and their arms slung over each other’s shoulders.

“Excuse me, Finn.”

Muscles went taught. Rey looked stiff and blank while Rose was outright afraid. That deep voice haunted Finn even during the day. It rarely felt like he’d been able to get away from it.

Seeing Kylo Ren up close was even more of a flashback to terror than spotting him across the room. This time Finn couldn’t run away.

Even now Kylo was donning all black. It washed him out and made his eyes that much more intense. There was a big scar that went diagonally along his face. But his hair was feathered out instead of stringy like in school. There wasn’t a sneer anymore, either.

_Traitor._

“What do you want, Kylo?” Rey growled. If they weren’t in public then he was sure his sister would be enacting some much-deserved vengeance.

Instead of some cruel diatribe or threat, or even a glare, Kylo’s expression morphed into one of pain and – wait, was that _remorse_? Kylo Ren knew how to look guilty?

“I go by Ben now,” he replied, and wasn’t that just another thing to stop Finn’s thoughts in their tracks?

The last time anyone heard that name – heard Ben Solo uttered publicly – was middle school.

“I asked what you want,” Rey said through gritted teeth.

Kylo – Ben’s eyes flickered over to Rey hesitantly before being drawn back to Finn.

“I’m sorry.”

And now the tracks were being blown up by dynamite.

“Excuse me?” Finn asked, brain feeling sluggish. There had to be some hearing loss or fever-induced delusions of grandeur.

“The last couple of years brought me perspective,” the brunet responded, “and shed a light on the path I went down. I allowed insidious thought from someone else cloud my judgment.”

Rey scoffed. “I bet the drugs didn’t help either. Did they?”

Ben’s mouth twisted into a puckered spectacle of distaste before it smoothed into a sad excuse of a grimace.

“No. It didn’t,” he agreed.

“What exactly was it that gave you this great perspective?” she asked coldly.

Finn had an idea.

“Your dad,” he said quietly.

Ben’s eyes watered as he nodded.

“He had his heart attack after taking me to the Emergency Room. I’ve relapsed many times since quitting but this time…I failed to take into account how low my resistance would be.”

Ben’s hand turned until they could get a look at Principal Organa near the stage. “I won’t let her lose both of us,” he went on, “I will clean up my mess.”

That was a lot of information to take in at once.

“I was cruel to you and a lot of others who are here. But particularly you. So I wanted to start my amends.”

“And you expect us to take your word for it?” Rose asked, incredulous.

Rey stood there, eyeing their old tormentor critically.

Tonight was throwing Finn all over the place and he couldn’t figure out how to right himself.

“Everything you and the other First Order assholes did to me haunts me,” Finn tole the man. “Every bruise, every scar, every name. I have never been able to forget them.” Ben had the decency to look like he was just a piece of shit. “I don’t know if it’s possible to forgive you yet. But it’s been ten years and I am ready to move on from it as I have with everything else.”

Hope was such a foreign emotion to see on Ben Solo. It gave the man life and a lightness that Finn had never seen before.

“Thank you, Finn,” Ben said gratefully. “If I need to do anything to earn the chance of your forgiveness, I will.”

Ben then looked to Rey. “I’m sorry to you as well. There was a point when I did a lot of those things to you because I thought my father was placing his affections on you after the disappointment I was to him."

Rey held his gaze, not immediately answering. When she did, it was after Finn squeezed her hand. “I do not forgive you yet either. You did a lot of shit. Not just to us.”

That hoped dimmed but Ben still gave her his attention. “Your father didn’t stop caring about you. He was concerned. And both of your parents believed in giving second chances. So I’ll give you one. If you throw it away like some tosser then I will come back and kick your arse worse than when we attended school.”

“Thank you,” Ben repeated, smiling like the two of them bestowed upon him a great gift.

“Now sod off,” Rey commanded, “we’d like to hear some of Poe’s singing before he’s finished.”

“My mom was hoping to get a chance to see you,” he added.

Rey nodded. “When the show is over.”

As Ben retreated from the table, there was applause around them while the music came to an end.

“Damn,” Finn sighed.

“Sorry, Finn,” she said.

Finn shook his head. “Don’t be. That was weird as hell and I had told Poe I’d listen to his music.”

“He’ll understand,” Rose assured him.

Finn, dejected, turned back to the stage. Poe was smiling politely to the crowd, fingers tapping against the guitar. As his eyes ran over the audience, they landed on Finn. A spark of warmth filled Finn in that instant and Poe’s smile grew more real.

“There’s one more song I thought I’d do for you,” Poe announced into the mic. “It’s my most important one and I think now’s as time as any to sing it.”

More cheers and applause started, though Poe’s eyes never left Finn as he struck the first chords of the song. It was sweet, almost with a folky sound to it. Some people were swaying, some were casting glances at their table for some reason.

“He’s really doing it,” Rose whispered in awe.

“One of them needed to grow some balls,” Rey returned.

Finn furrowed his brows and eyed them. “What are you talking about now?”

“Just listen to the song, Finn,” his sister sighed.

He was, wasn’t he?

The song’s lyrics were as sweet as the music behind them. Finn could see why so many people liked it. Though it hurt him to wonder who Poe had loved so much.

“ _In this motel, well past midnight_

_And I’m bluer than a bruise_

_You come drifting in, through the half-light_

_In my pilot jacket, too_ ”

…What?

Finn’e eyes widened.

No way.

He didn’t—

“ _And I hope this song I’m singing someday finds you_

_My letter to Finn_ ”

Now Finn was certain that _all_ eyes were on him.

Was it possible to feel so unbelievably stupid?

“I think you’re trying to be,” Rey said.

So he said that out loud.

“Do you get it now?” she asked.

Yeah. He’s sure he’s got it.

Why was that all it took for years of comments and looks to suddenly make sense?

“ _The best I never had_ ”

_The only chance I wish I had to take_.

“I’m such an idiot,” Finn repeated.

“Oblivious, not stupid,” Rose corrected gently.

“Now you know from his own mouth,” Rey pointed out, shouting above the applause. “So what are you going to do, Finn?”

What was he going to do?

_What was he going to do?_

Finn left his sister (and friend) behind to meet Poe at the bottom of the stage. Poe didn’t look scared like Finn felt. He seemed calm and ready for whatever answer he expected to hear.

“You sang me a love letter.”

“I did.”

“And the entire world knew about it but me.”

“It seems so, yes.”

“You’ve felt that way about me all this time?”

“I have,” Poe promised with a nod, “I still do.”

Then this was the point of no return and Finn didn’t care that a gymnasium full of people were watching. He went into Poe’s space and kissed him like he’s wanted to for twelve years.

Poe gave it all back. Firm hands were holding his face, plush lips were moving with his. Finn could get blasted right now and he wouldn’t give any cares about it.

The applause was what made it turn awkward.

Finn pulled away but not far. All this attention was not what he was about.

“Do you want to get out of here?” Poe asked in his ear.

“Instead of continuing to stand here with massively growing mortification?” Finn returned. “Hell yes.”

With a grin, Poe grabbed his hand and Finn didn’t think that Rey was going to be too upset with him for leaving without her.

Roaming through the halls this time was exhilarating instead of terrifying but went in a blur all the same.

“Where to?” Poe asked, pushing open the double doors to freedom. The evening burst of orange and pink from the setting sun made it feel like anything was possible.

“We’re going to my hotel room,” Finn answered. If anything was possible then he was taking advantage of it. Right now.

Poe tripped in surprise. Finn helped him right himself. “Straight to the dessert, Finn?”

“I just found out that we could have been doing things together for years. Everything else can wait until after I show you what I think about you recording a love song for me.”

The brunet’s lips stretched out into a grin. “I’m not going to fight you on it,” he shrugged.

“Good to know.”

“I mean, unless that’s what you’re into.”

Finn stared. That was something they were going to absolutely come back to.

Taking the car he brought was not an option since Rey had the keys. One look at the Mercedes Poe was stopped next to made the decision an even firmer one.

Finn didn’t think it mattered really.

Everything as soon as they were in the car turned into a haze. Like there was some dreamy Instagram filter that was put on them. Finn only really remembered that Poe’s hand felt warm and calloused against his. Also that the car smelled like dog hair. Not a romantic thing to remember but it was still completely a Poe one. It didn’t ruin any of it for Finn.

The haze was only just receding when Finn realized that they were in front of his hotel room. Finn was so glad that he and Rey had separate rooms.

Poe laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You okay, Finn?”

Finn could hear the second question that was left unsaid. _Are you having second thoughts?_

He nodded, at least until he could find his voice. “Yeah. I, uh, just can’t believe this is happening. Like, it’s hitting me, you know? I’m about to take you into my hotel room and bring to life hundreds of fantasies.”

“Hundreds, huh?” Poe responded with a relieved smile. It was cute to see that even Poe Dameron was capable of being trapped by nerves.

Finn blushed. “I didn’t mean to say that part.”

“I’m glad you did,” Poe countered. “And I know what you mean. I thought about this a lot too.”

In his own bout of nerves, Finn couldn’t get the keycard to slide in correctly. Four tries before he had the light turn green and the lock unlatch. He made himself laugh it off as he pushed the door open.

“What didn’t you tell me?” he asked. He stayed at the edge of the small room while Poe moved through the space.

“I thought I did,” Poe replied, amused.

“Frak, in a song,” Finn shook his head, still amazed. “I mean in school. Why didn’t you say anything to me back then?”

Poe regarded him with soft eyes. A patient smile curved along his mouth. “Why didn’t you?” he returned gently.

“Well, I—I asked you first.”

Poe chuckled. “Okay, yeah, fair.” A tanned hand ran through those luscious curls. Finn wanted to take a turn at it but stayed where he was. “Lame answer would be that I was going to graduate and leave before you.”

Finn nodded slowly and crossed his arms, leaning against the wall. “Yeah, that is definitely a lame answer.”

The other man grimaced. “I guess I didn’t think you were interested.”

Finn gaped. “What?”

“You were this sweet guy who acted nothing like the other First Order kids. Rey was always talking about you like you were amazing—and you were. I shouldn’t have brushed off Jess and Snap’s razzing for so long.”

“You really thought I wasn’t interested? You’re Poe Dameron,” Finn countered, shocked. “I’d have to be mental not to be into you.”

“I flirted!” Poe defended. “But you never reacted to it like you wanted it!”

“I thought you were just being nice! You were nice to _everyone_ and did the flirty thing with them all!”

“I was not like _that_ with more than you for two years, Finn,” Poe stated.

“Kriff,” Finn groaned, burying his face into his hands, “we were such idiots. Rey was right.”

Poe chuckled and shook his head. “Rey has rarely ever ben wrong. I didn’t see that changing after school.”

“Yeah, and she never lets me forget it,” Finn muttered. He was fully expecting her to relish in it tomorrow at breakfast.

His eyes locked on Poe as he approached. “ _I_ could help you forget it,” he offered. Poe’s fingers slipped open the buttons of Finn’s jacket with ease. It was hard to concentrate on anything else and he knew that was the point. He was welcoming it.

As Poe pushed the jacket off of his shoulders. Finn thanked the stars for aligning and got around to getting his own hands to reciprocate. He got to push his fingers through Poe’s curls and sink them in, eliciting a sigh from the man.

When his back hit the bed and their mouth reconnected, it was the happiest that he’d felt in a long time.

“Are you ready to do this?” Poe asked against his lips.

Finn’s answer was to suck in Poe’s bottom lip and pull the man in between his legs.

“I’ve been ready to do this since freshman year.”

“Then I won’t keep you waiting any longer.”

* * *

Finn woke with the sensation of swollen lips and a pleasantly sore ass. The chiming alarm on his phone had to be the reason for his surfacing. Awareness brought with it the fact that it was eight and therefore he had thirty minutes until he was supposed to meet Rey downstairs for The Cantina Diner.

He cracked his eyes open so that he could locate where the phone resided (everything was on the floor after last night) and tapped on the screen until the alarm went quiet. The bed was missing a second occupant, which started to fill Finn’s heart with a lonely ache – until the ceasing of falling water called his attention to it being the shower instead of rain.

Steam wafted from the bathroom moments later as the door was opened. Out stepped Poe with a towel thankfully wrapped around his waist (it saved Finn from his heart failing at the sight. A wet and naked Poe Dameron was too much for him to handle right now.) and damp hair dripping water from the ends of its curls. A radiant smile spread when Poe saw he was awake and damn – maybe his heart will give out still.

“Morning,” Poe said, drinking him in.

Finn tried to dispel the heat in his cheeks as he sat up. “Morning.”

Poe crossed the short distance between them and leaned down for a kiss.

Was there a way for Finn to have this all the time and not have it end in waking up?

Finn trailed his hands up Poe’s arms and down his back. Kriff. The muscles on this guy. He really, _really_ wanted to start another round and never resurface.

“You should have woken me up,” he mumbled into Poe’s mouth, “we could have considered water instead of needing two showers.”

Poe’s hands went on to explore his chest and that was heading down invitingly dangerous territory. “I don’t mind hopping in for a second wash.”

Oh God. That was so tempting.

“Then let me hear you say yes,” Poe said, and oh, guess Finn said that one out loud.

“I can’t,” Finn groaned, “we can’t. I have to actually use the shower and meet with Rey for breakfast.”

Poe made a noise of protest and shifted his mouth’s attention along Finn’s neck.

Finn could literally die happy right now.

So. Happy.

“You could join us,” Finn managed to offer. He was pretty sure Poe had a talent of turning his brain into liquid. What were thoughts again?

It was his turn to make the protests when Poe pulled back. The man’s eyes roved over Finn’s face, searching for a thing that Finn didn’t have the mental power to comprehend yet. He needed coffee big time.

“You sure you want me to come?” he asked.

“We spent the night confessing out feelings and having mind-blowing sex. Yeah. I’m going to mean it when I invite you to breakfast. Now I won’t be the only one Rey interrogates about the whole thing.”

The older man’s amusement filled his being and he started to shake with a repressed laugh. “And you’re absolutely certain she’s not going to care about the invite?”

“Of course she won’t,” Finn replied, “she would try to invite you herself and be personally offended that she’d be doing it for me.”

Poe nodded and smiled, and then pulled Finn in for another kiss.

“Okay,” he said when he stepped back to gather his clothes. “I can meet you guys there.”

Finn wondered if Jess and Snap were waiting on Poe to ask their own questions. The darker man had to convince his feet to move him away from Poe’s space and closer to the bathroom if they were going to get anywhere this morning.

“I guess I should get to the shower now.”

I can let myself out,” Poe assured.

It was silly but Finn wasn’t ready to see Poe go despite the plan to see each other again in less than an hour. Poe wasn’t looking away either, so maybe it was a mutual feeling.

Finn felt a blush creep up his neck and cheeks. “Okay. I’ll see you.”

Poe nodded, still smiling. “You will.”

Finn made it into the bathroom and gave in to the assurance so that he could close the door. He was as hopeless over Poe Dameron as ever.

* * *

The smugness that radiated off of Rey as Finn met her at the car was predictable. It still made him feel like he needed to double-check that the marks Poe had left on him were well-hidden.

“You did it. The world still goes on around us,” she told him over the radio.

“Did _you_?” Finn countered with.

“Oh. I did.” Rey grinned. “Jess and I will be seeing each other again.”

“That’s great, Rey,” he replied honestly. Both of them getting who they wanted wasn’t what he’d expected from this return home.

Rey shrugged. “I invited Rose to join us. I figured we owed her after last night.”

Finn nodded. “I’m okay with that. As long as you’re okay with Poe coming, too.”

That grin turned back to smug and knowing. “Why would I have a problem with that?” she asked innocently. “The more the merrier. It’s my turn to catch up with him.”

They knew each other too well. “Please don’t grill him so much that he decides this was a mistake.”

“Trust me, Finn,” Rey replied, “that isn’t going to happen. Not after this long and so much mutual pining.”

Poe knew about the scar along his spine and didn’t leave in disgust. He saw years of Finn making a fool of himself. Finn had to only argue with his inner demons. This was the worst time to doubt Poe.

If a guy willingly shares to the public a song that he’s in with you then he’s sure as kriff not going to be scared off easily, right?

The first thing Finn saw as they turned into The Cantina’s parking lot was Rose waiting by the entrance in a tan jumpsuit that accentuated her curves. She smiled and waved when she spotted them, which he returned since Rey was busy sliding the car into a nearby spot.

“I’m so glad we’re doing this,” Rose greeted when they reached her. She threw her arms around them for a hug like last night. “It’s like old times.”

“We’ll have to stay in touch this time,” Rey suggested, “so we can plan more personal reunions.”

“It’s been too long,” Finn agreed. That had been on him. This town was the last place he wanted to be and he let that include leaving behind the few friends he’d had.

“It has,” Rose nodded, “and if it happens again, I will hit you up at your firm to blast you with a taser in front of your co-workers.”

He didn’t believe she’d actually do that. But he won’t ignore the sentiment behind the threat regardless.

“I got our names on the list,” she went on,” but it won’t be a long wait.”

“Isn’t she usually busy?” Rey frowned with surprise.

“Oh she is. But since she likes to still consider us family, it’s a rule not to leave us waiting.”

Rey smiled warmly as she looked inside, pulling open the door. “We’ll need to give her a big thank you then.”

Finn picked up on the next car to turn in. His insides felt full of racing butterflies all over again.

“Is that Poe?” Rose asked, a grin in her voice.

“Let’s go get the table, Rose,’ Rey replied, tugging open the door. “The boys can meet us inside.”

He’ll have to appreciate that later. It was hard to think past Poe at the moment.

The man grinned at Finn when he got out of the car and he felt his own face return the expression. Poe didn’t walk over right away, though; he had to stop on the other side of the car first and open the door for a very excited puppy that hopped right out.

An excited Corgi that ran circles around Poe’s legs with happy barks and tried to climb up the man as they drew closer. He could get used to hearing Poe’s laugh when it was so carefree.

“I hope you don’t mind that I brought her,” Poe said. “After leaving her with Snap all day yesterday, I couldn’t make her stay in the hotel room again.”

“I don’t think anyone’s going to mind,” Finn assured him.

The dog was staring at him, cautious, and had moved herself between them. It was adorable that she was acting like Poe’s guard. No wonder Poe loved her so much. BB was sniffing at Finn, eyes still waiting for him to make the wrong move.

“Hi, BB,” he greeted and held his hand out for her to make the job easier. It felt like this was an important test.

It was only when BB sat back and licked at his fingers with vigor that Finn relaxed. He took it as a sign that he passed.

“Is Rey inside?” Poe asked, bright and relieved, too, that Finn had passed the inspection.

“She got the table,” Finn nodded and he petted BB’s head. “Rose is in there with her.”

“I guess we shouldn’t leave them waiting.”

“I’ll let you take this last chance to back out before the interrogation starts.”

Poe shook his head. “I’m good, Finn.” He stepped around BB to lean into Finn’s space. The kiss was still as sweet as Poe himself. Finn hoped that there would be more in the future. The man caught Finn’s hand as he pulled back, fingers lacing tan with brown.

“Are _you_ ready?” Poe asked.

Ten years hadn’t been enough to sway him away from loving Poe. There was a song out in the world that said the same thing happened for the other man. Now, Finn had the searing memories of Poe’s touch. They were standing in a parking lot with a cute ass dog and Finn’s sister waiting for them inside with their good friend to play the protective role out of long-waited anticipation.

Finn couldn’t wait for them to work out the next step in this relationship.

“Yeah,” he nodded, pulling open the diner’s door. “I’m more than ready.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for the lack of sex in the hotel room. I'm slowly trying to get comfortable with writing it outside of RPing. Reading all these good Explicit and Mature fics do not help a girl's confidence, okay?


End file.
